Burp Mortification

Carla felt out of place at the party, so when a cute guy offered her a few swigs of a hip, imported European beer, she eagerly took a few, hoping to cement her cool quotient.  She never once thought of the aftereffects, a quite audible burp from the fermentation of her bottled brew.  Carla knew she had blown it as her potential life partner lifted his eyebrows in surprise and started to edge away.

She would have skulked away, but he had left her the bottle, and it was quite tasty.  Besides, she thought, staying to finish it would help her get over her burp mortification.

 

Carla Felt Like A Yoga Loser - SOLD

Carla felt like such a yoga loser.  While everyone else was doing complex poses, she couldn't even complete a Fists Forward Bend.  She decided she no longer wanted a "yoga butt."

You know, I didn't write this in my post initially, but I'll add a little story here.  I lasted about 90 seconds in a yoga class.  It was offered at work, and as it so happened, a co-worker and I had to work late.  Then I had to run out to the car to get my yoga gear which I had forgotten to bring in.  It was hot and humid and I was rushing.  And THEN, I couldn't find which room it was. Finally I get into where I need to go, everyone is relaxed and breathing.  The instructor keeps saying, breath in and breath out, but my heart is POUNDING from all my racing around.  I start the in and out breath, but it's going too fast for me, and I start to hyperventilate.  I start to think my yoga mat is "smelly."  Finally I can't take it, grab my crinkly plastic bag and smelly mat, and hightail it out of there.  Ah, yes, it was so relaxing! (-;